On the ride home from that awful visit a seed of strength was firmly planted in my being. It started out as anger, indignation, and a streak of stubbornness. Who was she to tell me how long I had to live? She doesn’t even know me!

I was determined to beat the odds and did everything in my power to do so. In addition to chemotherapy, I addressed every aspect of my life. I left my stressful job and started a daily routine of exercise, prayer, visualization, and affirmations. While I was waiting in the car to pick up my daughter from school or in line at the store, I would visualize my immune system melting the cancer cells away. As I drank water – and lots of it - I would see myself cleansing the residue of dead cancer cells out of my body. While taking a shower, I talked to my body, urging it to clear out the cancer and thanking it for its amazing work.

To learn how I could build my immune system, I consulted with a holistic physician and read books on holistic healing. I spent time purchasing organic produce and supplements with cancer-fighting properties. I even gave up sugar, which I loved, with the exception of really dark chocolate. I started using eco-friendly cleaners and natural shampoos and lotions.

I focused on serving others in my breast cancer support group, at church and by delivering meals to elderly people in my neighborhood. Most of all, I began to devote time to enriching all of my relationships, especially with my family, myself and God.

All of these practices gave me a sense of power, knowing I was doing something concrete to support my healing. And it seemed to be working. Remarkably, my side effects were minimal and my tumors shrank with every scan.

But still, I fought off depression and was haunted by the sinking feeling I was going to die. With all the focus on myself and getting well, I felt useless and empty. I wasn’t saying yes to life; I was desperately fighting to stay alive. There is a big difference.

I was isolating and found myself laying on my bed with my nine-year-old daughter wondering how long I’d be around for her. Every day, I felt like I was digging and clawing out of a hole I created for myself. I had too much time to think, and most of my thoughts were negative. I was used to going to the office and being busy every day, and quite frankly, focusing on just me and my health was getting old.

I spent my career, ironically, in health care public relations. A part of my job was writing and pitching to the media patient success stories. My husband Mike started encouraging me to write a book about my cancer experience, but I felt like my journey had just begun.

That summer, we went on vacation with Mike’s family to a beautiful lake in Canada. On one of my daily morning walks, an idea popped into my mind. “Why not write a book about other advanced stage cancer patients and how they beat the odds?” I thought it would be therapeutic for me, and more important, help others. I soon began interviewing cancer survivors from around the country for my first book, From Incurable to Incredible: Cancer Survivors Who Beat the Odds.

I’ll never forget my first interview. Dave Massey had twice survived stage IV cancer after being told he had six months to live. He dodged having a leg amputated but lost his left lung. Despite this and all the side effects from heavy chemotherapy and radiation, he told me had just ran his second 26-mile marathon. I was like a dry sponge hungrily soaking up the hope of his story.

And there were many more people – 27 to be exact. Each story had a different twist, but all had one common denominator: they faced terminal prognoses but never gave up. And their lives were transformed as a result.

The more stories I heard, the more it seemed that surviving unbeatable odds was the norm, not the exception. I knew cognitively that wasn’t the case, but I chose to focus on the positive and know that I, too, could live many healthy and happy years.

I started a blog called Miracle Survivors and became very active online, opening my world to more extraordinary people who became my support system. I have traveled to different parts of the country, speaking to groups about my experience and what I’ve learned “miracle survivors” share in common. Public speaking was always one of my greatest fears, but now I feel empowered by it. I have been blessed by the hundreds of people I’ve met and places I’ve experienced. I have come out of my shell and feel an openness I never had prior to my diagnosis.

I advocate for fellow stage IV survivors and have served as a cancer mentor through an organization called Imerman Angels and other organizations. Through the years, I have lost many friends. It has been extremely painful, and it has reminded me how precious life is and how fortunate I am to be alive and feeling healthy. I still have cancer in my body, according to scans, but it does not define me. I am fortunate to be on a treatment that has been working for almost a year and a half. I trust in God and divine order that I’ll find a way to continue on my path to healing.

One important way I have said yes to life is to say no to people and things that are harmful to me. I have a particularly challenging person in my life who is mentally ill and drug addicted. For a good portion of my life, I put their needs before mine and compromised my own emotional and physical health in the process. Cancer has taught me to put myself first once and for all, even though some people might not like it. I firmly believe in the body-mind-spirit connection and know that involving myself with toxic people can literally kill me. So I’m saving myself in the process, while letting the other person become more responsible for their own life.

I also say yes to my body by continuing to choose healthy foods and exercise. I don’t go to extremes like I did at first, which I believe caused me stress. I allow myself indulgences, but for the most part maintain a whole, organic food diet. I go to yoga classes, get massages and take daily walks. All of these practices have helped me maintain a good quality of life throughout many chemo treatments.

Some people with stage IV cancer don’t consider themselves survivors. They tell me they’re dying of cancer. My message is that we’re living with cancer. That’s what I’m illustrating with my upcoming book, Miracle Survivors, which is due out November 2014. I’m blessed to say that right now I’m living well with cancer. I know that can change tomorrow but I choose to stay in the moment and not fear the future.

I am blessed to be here for my daughter, who is now 15 years old. When I was first diagnosed with stage II cancer, she was just three years old. Today, I can say yes to her life, too. I’ve been here for so many of her milestones – puberty, entering high school, her first band performance, her first boyfriend and more.

Through everything, she has been my driving force for never giving up. For that, I am forever grateful.

The other day she told me she didn’t know what she would do without me. By saying yes to life, my hope is she won’t have to for a very, very long time.

~ Tami Boehmer ~

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We do not endorse any practice / product or make any medical claims – the information above is a personal story that others may find informative.